Hello and welcome to The Couples Expert Podcast, with your host Stuart Fensterheim. This is episode 182 or our show. Today’s episode is full of tools, tips, and Stuart’s pearls of wisdom to create a marriage that will last a lifetime.

Whether you had premarital counseling or not, this episode is to help you to learn how to make your relationship meaningful and significant. None of us get married to be finding ourselves in an empty, lonely relationship. Many times this happens because we don’t really understand what marriage is all about. Tune in today and keep your marriage alive, passionate, and close.

What you’ll learn from today’s podcast:

• Authenticity and vulnerability 2:40
• You need to have a plan 7:25
• Learning how to communicate with your spouse 10:40
• Triggers 16:45
• 3 main elements of communication 19:40
• How do we learn how to navigate challenges 20:45
• Setting yourself up for having realistic expectations 22:25
• Children 25:45
• You have to work on the trust you have for each other 28:05
• What is going to change with marriage? 30:20
• You have to talk about everything 31:40
• Social media 37:20
• Money and financial planning 39:00
• Sex and intimacy 40:30

The most important thing to remember about your first year of marriage is to enjoy your newlywed status. Also, memorize this: “The first year of marriage is a learning and transitional period for the rest of your life”

During this first year transition, you need to be able to view your conflicts and moments of disconnection as opportunities for growth. What may seem like a complaint from your partner, can be a gold mine to learn what they need.

If you work on all of these things, at the end of the day, you will be able to roll over in bed, look and your partner, smile and say “life is good.”

Thank you for spending part of your day with The Couples Experts. We hope you enjoyed the show and take away something meaningful to your relationship. Until next time stay connected!

The Couples Expert Podcast is sponsored by: Stuart’s Daily Notes: Subscribe and change your relationship in 5 minutes a day with a video sent to your email inbox. The response has been overwhelmingly positive. Stuart’s Daily Notes can help you too!  https://www.thecouplesexpertscottsdale.com/stuart-daily-notes/

Subscribe to the podcast on iTunes: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-couples-expert/id951362894?mt=2

Email: Stuart would love to hear from you. If you have a comment, review, or suggestion for a topic Stuart can tackle in the future, please email him at podcast@thecouplesexperts.com

Next week: Join us in two weeks as Stuart talks about how to be accountable to yourself, learning how to communicate both in and out of the bedroom. Until then, stay connected.

Hello and welcome to The Couples Expert Podcast, with your host Stuart Fensterheim. This is episode 181 or our show. Today, Stuart talks about the difference in sexual desire.

We come together quite often with different types of libidos, but when we first get together and the passion is there. After a period of time, you settle in with your partner, and reality and the stresses of life hits. We then begin to realize that our libidos are just not the same, and the sexuality diminishes.

What you’ll learn from today’s podcast:

• Difference between two different libidos [2:00]
• Come up with a sex number [3:00]
• Compromise by broadening your range of activities that are sexual [11:00]
• Talk about how things are going sexually for the two of you [13:00]
• If you have a higher sex drive, you should not take it personally if your partner has a lower libido drive [14:00]
• Do not be critical and negative about your partner [17:00]
• The cuddle hormone [18:10]
• Where is the compromise [20:20]
• Being comfortable with masterbation [21:30]
• You have to be really honest with one another [24:00]

Quote:  “We can either jump on the trampoline, or we can just screw”

4 Tips when you have this sex drive difference:

1. Laughter; laugh about this, not make it as serious as it might feel.
2. Make the relationship the most important thing. You better have a relationship where your partner feels courted every day of your life. You need to stir up those romantic juices that quite often lead to more passion.
3. Instead of complaining about a “dry spell”, divert that sexual energy into other things. Allow your relationship to have ebbs and flows, and don’t let it get in the way of caring and loving of each other.
4. Your sex life is only one aspect of your relationship, and that the two of you, together, are going to make the caring and loving you have for one another more important than any sex act or pattern.

Thank you for spending part of your day with The Couples Experts. We hope you enjoyed the show and take away something meaningful to your relationship. Until next time stay connected!

The Couples Expert Podcast is sponsored by: Annual Relationship Checkup: Sure, we get our vehicles serviced, have maintenance done on our homes, and see our local GP to make sure our bodies are in good working order, but sadly, we tend to neglect one of the most important things in our lives – the health of our relationship.  https://www.thecouplesexpertscottsdale.com/annual-relationship-check-up/

Subscribe to the podcast on iTunes: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-couples-expert/id951362894?mt=2

Email: Stuart would love to hear from you. If you have a comment, review, or suggestion for a topic Stuart can tackle in the future, please email him at podcast@thecouplesexperts.com

*Today’s podcast was inspired in part, by Jessica McCleese’s article on Coping with Different libidos, and Michelle Weiner’s Tips for Partner’s with Higher Sex Drives.