The Couples Expert

Welcome to The Couples Expert Podcast. In today's show Stuart is going to talk about a subject that most of you will be familiar with, and some of you may struggle with: That of the impact of Social Media on your life and relationships.

Direct download: 199_Is_Social_Media_Destroying_my_Marriage__Encore.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:45pm PDT
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Welcome to The Couples Expert Podcast with your host Stuart Fensterheim. This week Stuart is lightening things up with a podcast on how humor and positivity can create an attitude and purpose in your relationship that will transform your lives.

Gratitude and appreciation are key ingredients in a loving relationship. Ways of showing love are showing appreciation, sharing your feelings, making your partner feel special and making them feel important. Small changes in behavior such as showing affection, a simple hug and kiss makes a huge difference. You can’t compel someone to do this; it has to come from the heart. We can ask for what we need and when our partner gives it to us, we need to recognize that as a huge step forward from what your relationship dynamic might have been in the past.

What you’ll learn from today’s podcast:

  • Ways to show gratitude to your partner  [7:09]
  • Courting behavior and what it does for you as a couple [19:05]
  • Learning the love language in multi-media [20:10]
  • Sharing your passions and hobbies [24:30]
  • Humor and keeping life fun [30:55]

Couples Weekend: The Two Days and 7 Conversations Weekend sponsors The Couples Experts Podcast. This couple’s weekend is not a retreat but a learning experience for you and your partner to connect and communicate in a deeper and more authentic way. Sign up now for our December weekend! Go to the link for the weekend on the website: https://www.thecouplesexpertscottsdale.com/hold-me-tight/

Subscribe: You can subscribe to The Couples Expert Podcast on iTunes. Stuart would love it if you’d write a review or suggest a future topic. https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-couples-expert/id951362894?mt=2

The Couples Expert Wants To Hear From You!

Email: You can email Stuart at podcast@thecouplesexperts.com and tell him about your relationship, ask questions or suggest a guest or future topic for the show. Stuart reads and responds to each and every email.

Thank you so much for spending part of your day with Stuart Fensterheim, The Couples Expert. We hope today’s show has been helpful and meaningful to you. Until next time, stay positive, and stay connected.

Direct download: 198_198_-_Laugh_Before_You_Cry__Divorce_Proof_Your_Marriage_-_Encore.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 12:41pm PDT
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This encore episode of The Couples Expert Podcast is all about appreciating all the special women in our lives, but particularly our mothers and the mothers of our children. Listen as Stuart recounts his growing up in a blended family and the lessons he learned about the importance of his Mother and her role in the family. He also had a Stepmother whom he loved and was very influential in his life. He talks about ways to honor the important women in your life this Motherâ•˙s Day, (Sunday, May 12th).

 

What you'll learn from today's podcast:

Moms deserve your encouragement every day at 3:00

It helps when you're struggling to see your partner through fresh eyes at 4:17

Dad's responsibility on Mother's Day at 5:49

Some suggestions for making Mom's day special at 7:45

Recognize your partner for all they do and show appreciation at 10:49

Suggestions for a romantic Mother's Day treat for her at 12:05

If you listen you will learn what she wants at 15:19

Honor Mom and Grandmother on Mother's Day 17:44

Stepmoms are Moms too at 18:21

View the complete show notes here

Direct download: 197_How_to_Appreciate_the_Women_in_Your_Life_on_Mothers_Day_-_Encore.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 11:03am PDT
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In this encore episode of The Couples Expert podcast, Stuart speaks of remarriage & the "Doubt Factor" with special guest Brian Mayer.

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Hello and welcome to The Couples Expert Podcast with your host Stuart Fensterheim. This week on the show, Stuart is going to discuss the pain and consequences of financial infidelity. This kind of relationship injury has an incredible impact on a couple.

Direct download: 195_Broke_and_Broken_-_The_pain_of_financial_infidelity_-_Encore.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 9:28am PDT
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Hello and welcome to The Couples Expert Podcast with your host Stuart Fensterheim. This is an encore episode of our show. Stuart talks about coping with separation issues in your relationship related to work. How do we keep a close and connected relations

Direct download: 193-Staying_Together_when_Work_Keeps_You_Away_-_Encore.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:48am PDT
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Encore episode is about living and loving in middle age. Stuart answers some burning questions you may have about life after 60. Is it all downhill from here? Listen in as Stuart addresses the concerns that many of you have about love and aging.

Direct download: 193_193_-_Living_and_Loving_in_Middle_Age_-_Life_After_50_-_Encore.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 9:24am PDT
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Hello and welcome to The Couples Expert Podcast with your host Stuart Fensterheim. This is episode 146 of our show. We’re so happy that you’re here with us for the show. Today Stuart is discussing an all too common scenario for couples: When two people in a committed relationship end up living like roommates instead of lovers.  Listen in while Stuart addresses this familiar problem.

Stuart often talks about the significance of 6 years. That’s the average amount of time that couples live with their problems before they seek help from a relationship counselor. Those 6 years can be a time of strife and conflict; or it can be a time of reducing your relationship to living as roommates. This is a terrible feeling either way. Feeling alone is so painful.

What you’ll learn from today’s podcast:

  • The pain of having roommates [2:25]

  • It’s painful to live without connection  [4:00]

  • It doesn’t matter how long you’ve been together [8:20]

  • Hallway sex- Where’s the passion? [9:04]

  • Why you need to keep passion a priority [10:40]

  • How to keep it interesting; keep your partner in mind  [12:12]

  • No one wants a roommate when they can have a great love   [22:25]

 

If you’re living separate lives, you aren’t working on your relationship. In order to keep the passion and the love alive, you must make your relationship the priority. Spend time together, have adventures and make memories.  It’s all about the connection and keeping that passion for your life together.  Keeping that emotional connection is the only way to keep your relationship from deteriorating into roommate status.

We cannot assume our partner knows how important they are to us. We have to never take them for granted, and to always let them know that they are the most important person in life to us. Invest your time and care into your relationship. Surprise your partner, send them gifts, show them that you’re thinking of them. Court them, keep the romance alive. In order to avoid the roommate feeling you have to keep the passion alive.

Take your partner and get away a couple of times a year. Date nights once a month, or more often as possible. These things are crucial to avoiding the roommate issue. It doesn’t matter how busy you are, you can find the time if it’s important to you. Don’t make excuses, don’t cop out. This is important. Treat your relationship with the care and concern it deserves. Be kind and sweet to one another and keep your emotional connection strong. It takes commitment on both your parts. It’s not always easy, but it’s so worth it.

Subscribe: You can subscribe to The Couples Expert Podcast on iTunes. Stuart would love it if you’d write a review or suggest a future topic. https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-couples-expert/id951362894?mt=2

The Couples Expert Wants To Hear From You!

Email Stuart: podcast@thecouplesexperts.com

Relationship check ups are important! Find one here: https://www.thecouplesexpertscottsdale.com/annual-relationship-check-up

Thank you for spending part of your day with us. Until next time, stay connected!

Direct download: 192_Wheres_the_fire_I_feel_like_your_my_roommate.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 9:07am PDT
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Hi and welcome to The Couples Expert Podcast with your host Stuart Fensterheim The Couples Expert. Stuart is going to speak today about what it means to be a good partner in your relationship. About ways to assess if you’re being a good partner, and if your partner is being good to you. After all, it takes both of you contributing to the relationship in equal measure in order for you to have a true partnership where you both feel loved and important. 

Stuart talks about the life of his Mother in Law Lolita who passed away last week. Stuart always felt included and loved and was brought quickly into the family when he and Debbie married. She and her husband were married for 64 years. Stuart is dedicating this podcast to her memory.

We know there’s no perfect marriage. Every couple creates their own love story.What needs to be there is a passion for making your partner happy and for being the perfect partner for them. You see your partner’s happiness is as important (or more so) than your own.  Today Stuart will have you take a look at your own relationship, and what kind of partner you are in your own love story. Are you the right partner in your relationship? Let’s take a look.

What you’ll learn from today’s podcast:

  • The best partners make the relationship a top priority in their lives  [7:35]
  • Respect and consideration (sensitivity) for your partner’s feelings is more important that getting your way or winning an argument  [8:39]
  • Do you spend your time effort and energy on your relationship? What about romance and emotional connection? [11:58]
  • The best partners let small issues go. Do you hold onto resentments and keep score? [14:24]
  • What would conflict look like for you and your partner? [16:22]
  • Why controlling your emotions is needed instead of getting angry, bringing up the past, threatening to divorce, or escalating an issue [18:24]
  • Why you need to be a good listener. Are you hearing what your partner is trying to tell you ? [25:09]
  • A good partner shares in and is supportive of what their partner is interested in [28:57]
  • A good partner is affectionate and makes sure their partner’s needs for touch and sexuality are taken care of [31:00]

All of these ingredients are here for each of you to evaluate your relationship and yourself as a partner. Would you give yourself a high score, or are you seeing some things you need to work on?

Take the Are you a good partner quiz!

Take the test for yourself and one for your partner. Then you both need to have a conversation about what it is about your relationship that can be improved. Don’t be critical, but be positive in learning that you can dedicate yourselves to improving the kind of partner you are to one another.

Thank you for joining us on The Couples Expert podcast. We’re glad you’re here. Come back next week for another episode with Stuart Fensterheim, The Couples Expert.

Until then, be a good partner, and stay connected!

Sponsored by Stuarts daily notes: If you could improve your relationship in just 5 minutes a day, would you? I think you would. Stuart is offering his Stuart’s Daily Notes to subscribers to give you real tips and sound advice on being the best partners you can be. Learn more and subscribe here:  https://www.thecouplesexpertscottsdale.com/stuart-daily-notes/

Subscribe: You can subscribe to The Couples Expert Podcast on iTunes. Stuart would love it if you’d write a review or suggest a future topic. https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-couples-expert/id951362894?mt=2

The Couples Expert Wants To Hear From You!

Email: You can email Stuart at podcast@thecouplesexperts.com and tell him about your relationship, ask questions or suggest a guest or future topic for the show. Stuart reads and responds to each and every email.

Thank you so much for spending part of your day with Stuart Fensterheim, The Couples Expert. We hope today’s show has been helpful and meaningful to you. Until next time, stay positive, and stay connected.

Direct download: 191_191-Are_You_a_Good_Partner_.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 2:40pm PDT
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In this encore episode of The Couples Expert Podcast, Stuart is discussing a troubling topic today; infidelity.

All of Stuart’s work centers around creating and maintaining healthy couple relationships. He believes that this is truly the cornerstone of a healthy society as a whole. Healthy relationships passed down from parents who model them for their children create generations of healthy relationships and a healthier society overall. Infidelity, whether it be sexual, emotional or even financial in nature, breaks down the connection and the trust that’s needed to keep the relationship healthy and happy. It’s his belief that infidelity causes some of the most severe relationship injuries that exist.  

What you’ll learn from today’s podcast:

  • Infidelity destroys families and destroys connections [4:03]
  • Infidelity creates personal emotional trauma [10:20]
  • Men and women approach infidelity differently [14:22]
  • Strip clubs, massage parlors and prostitution are a factor [16:24]
  • Women have different reasons to cheat  [22:02]
  • A return to attachment is needed [23:03]
Direct download: 190_The_Reason_We_All_Cheat_-_Stuart_Tells_All_-_Encore.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 12:42pm PDT
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Welcome to episode 189 of our show, this is an encore presentation. Your host Stuart Fensterheim has some insights to share with his listeners today about intimate partner relationships and sexual intimacy with your partner; specifically about banishing boredom from your bedroom.

Direct download: 189_Banish_Boredom_in_the_Bedroom-Encore.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:03pm PDT
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Hi and welcome to The Couples Expert Podcast with your host Stuart Fensterheim. This is episode 188 of our show. Thank you for listening today as Stuart welcomes guest Jim Thomas back to the show.  They will be discussing sexuality, emotional intimacy, and vulnerability.  

 

What you’ll learn from today’s podcast:

  • How to resolve differences in sexual needs [4:20]
  • Being vulnerable sexually [6:40]
  • Emotional and intimate [8:00]
  • How do you define what sex is? [10:50]
  • Is kissing more intimate than sex? [12:00]
  • What about pornography? [14:40]
  • A man’s need for more emotional intimacy [16:45]
  • Average sex is good too [24:00]
  • Use different approaches to sex [28:30]
  • When to talk about your sexual desires and needs [31:45]
  • Discover your sexuality [40:30]
  • Throw the rules out [41:45]

 

What we want is to have a fun, loving, caring, vulnerable experience for two people who care about one another, an experience you don’t share with anyone else. Trust your partner, and that both of you want to feel loved and important to each other.

 

Until next time, Stay Connected

 

The Couples Expert Podcast is sponsored by:  Stuart’s Daily Notes: Subscribe and change your relationship in 5 minutes a day with a video sent to your email inbox. The response has been overwhelmingly positive. Stuart’s Daily Notes can help you too!   

Learn More: https://www.thecouplesexpertscottsdale.com/stuart-daily-notes/

Subscribe to the podcast on iTunes:https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-couples-expert/id951362894?mt=2

Email: Stuart would love to hear from you. If you have a comment, review, or suggestion for a topic Stuart can tackle in the future, please email him at podcast@thecouplesexperts.com

 

Next time on The Couples Expert Podcast:

Join us next time as Stuart discusses how childhood affects our relationships.

Direct download: 188_-_Emotional_Intimacy_-_Bringing_Sex_Out_of_the_Boardroom.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:40am PDT
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This is an Encore Presentation, this podcast originally aired in January of 2017. 

Hello and welcome to The Couples Expert Podcast with Stuart Fensterheim. Stuart is discussing how to set realistic and meaningful relationship goals for the New Year. We all want to do better and be better and the New Year is the new beginning that many of us use as a jumping off point for furthering our goals. The Couples Experts would like to thank you for a great 2018. Take a listen while Stuart discusses some ideas for 2019.

What you’ll learn from today’s podcast:

  • Why we set goals instead of resolutions –[12:20]
  • Goals are promises you make to yourself –[15:00]
  • How to follow up and check in with your partner regularly  –[16:18]
  • What you should include in your goal lists –[21:15]
  • Some important suggestions for your growth as a couple. –[32:00]
  • Share your lists and compare together  –[33:50]

The Couples Expert Podcast is sponsored by: Stuart’s Daily Notes: Subscribe and change your relationship in 5 minutes a day with a video sent to your email inbox. The response has been overwhelmingly positive. Stuart’s Daily Notes can help you too!  https://www.thecouplesexpertscottsdale.com/stuart-daily-notes/

Subscribe to the podcast on iTunes: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-couples-expert/id951362894?mt=2

Email: Stuart would love to hear from you. If you have a comment, review, or suggestion for a topic Stuart can tackle in the future, please email him at podcast@thecouplesexperts.com

Direct download: Setting_Meaningful_Relationship_Goals_for_the_New_Year_-Encore.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 12:11pm PDT
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