The Couples Expert (Couples Relatiohships)

In episode 137 of this week's podcast, Stuart speaks of using humor and positivity to divorce-proof your marriage. 

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In this Halloween- themed episode Stuart gives couples who’ve been “spooked” in their relationship some alternatives to divorcing. Stuart believes that unless there are extremes of violence and substance abuse issues, that divorce is NOT the answer to your marital problems.

We can get into negative cycles and repeat those patterns in our relationships. Wanting to break out of those is scary but once each partner relates all of the qualities about their partner to these negative cycles, their instincts are to get away from the negativity, and the person with whom they associate the negativity. Without the tools to fix the problems people feel helpless and want to give up and /or run away.

Read the complete show notes here: 

Don't Let Your Marriage Spook You Into Divorce Show Notes

Direct download: Dont_Let_Your_Marriage_SPOOK_You_Into_Divorce.mp3
Category:Couples Relatiohships -- posted at: 12:52pm PDT

In episode 82 of the Couples Expert Podcast Stuart talks about the last stage of life, love and relationships. We’ve raised our kids, they’re out on their own and maybe having families of their own and  here we are with our partners rattling around in our empty nest. It can be a tough time if you’re not prepared for it. Leaving you feeling kind of lost and alone. You may have been living separate lives and now need to get reacquainted. Now is the time to start this last stage of your long term life and relationship by seeing your partner in a new way and rekindling the love and connection between the two  of you.

Stuart also discusses how we need to set boundaries with our adult children and in our role of grandparents. If you don’t discuss and agree on where those boundaries are, it can cause huge problems in your relationship. We need to support and communicate with our adult children but never meddle or interfere. We can feel proud that we launched our adult children and that they are doing well. They can be equipped to handle their own loving relationships because we’ve modeled a healthy partnership for them.

Read the full show notes on the The Couples Expert blog here:

http://www.thecouplesexpertscottsdale.com/podcasts/

Direct download: Rekindle_Your_Love_Again_in_the_Retirement_Years.mp3
Category:Couples Relatiohships -- posted at: 12:57pm PDT

Trauma---and connection. Have you ever thought about the relationship between the words? Can true connection exist in a world tainted by trauma? Fortunately for many, the answer is YES. Trauma can steal SO MUCH of the good from our lives and affect relationships in extremely negative ways, but there is HOPE. My guest today is committed to bringing hope, healing and connection to those who have experienced trauma. I’m excited to introduce you to Laura!

Laura Reagan, LCSW-C, practices in Maryland, working specifically with individuals and couples affected by trauma. Laura and I actually met online in a Facebook group, discussing our practices and podcasts. We proudly bond as Terrapins from the University of Maryland! Laura’s podcast is Therapy Chat—definitely worth your time in listening! Laura is a Daring Way facilitator, which is a therapy technique based on the research of Dr. Brene’ Brown. She also implements Sensorimotor Psychotherapy in her practice. 

Laura explains why she found a home within the trauma niche of therapy. After taking classes about violence against women and children, Laura was intrigued by the reasons behind abusive behavior and the oft-repeated cycles of abuse. Children, no matter how young, can experience harmful emotional effects from domestic violence taking place around them. Through her work at a sexual assault crisis center, Laura felt compelled to devote her life’s work to helping people recover from the long-term effects of trauma. She works now to provide therapy, to stop the cycles, and to be part of the CHANGE.

You can read the full show notes and access all the links and resources at www.thecouplesexpertscottsdale.com

Direct download: 70_From_Trauma_To_Connection_Edited.mp3
Category:Couples Relatiohships -- posted at: 3:00am PDT

Everyone longs to be "in love" and have a deep connection to a partner that will always be there for them. Part of being connected is also revealing your vulnerability. That's not a part of love that we normally look forward to. No one enjoys being vulnerable. Today's guest is Veronica Kallos-Lilly and she is going to guide us through the steps to have a L.O.V.E. connection!

You can read the full show notes and access all the links and resources at www.thecouplesexpertscottsdale.com


What is a map? It helps us understand where you are. It helps you find your way if you are lost. It also helps you know where you are (or should be) headed.

 

It can be confusing when each partner has a yearning to feel that they are valuable, and connected to the other, but still don’t. Many times people change their physical appearance in hopes of getting the love and attention they want from their partner.

 

Of course, this is a sad place for your relationship, because it means that love is based on an outward condition, and may be over when the outward appearance changes.

 

This is why a map is important. You can create a clear plan to have a connection far deeper than anything outward. Having a partner in your life that you are connected to actually changes your life and the science bears it out. You live longer, and have a happier life when you are in a loving relationship. Your entire existence can feel joyful and wonderful, and your outlook on life is more positive, so you are better in every aspect of your life.

 

  1. Establish a relationship that is safe and secure, and each of you view the challenges in the same light. 
  2. Establish a relationship where you can share your negative assumptions, interpretations and feelings because you can’t read each others mind. Most importantly, make sure you believe what your partner tells you!

 

How do you follow this map? Old wounds may surface, and you may get off track. This is where a counselor with the same map can help you stay on track.

 

Getting caught up in the blame game isn’t helpful. However, when you find your relationship in a vulnerable spot and yet still feel a connection to your partner, it is truly magical.

 

When you offer your partner a better life and support them unconditionally, then you can experience a connection that is pure bliss!

You can read the full show notes and access all the links and resources at www.thecouplesexpertscottsdale.com

Direct download: TCS_69_Follow_the_map_edited.mp3
Category:Couples Relatiohships -- posted at: 3:00am PDT

We’re in the dog days of summer, and it has been extremely hot here in Scottsdale. Sure, folks say “It’s not bad because it’s a dry heat”, but let me assure you that during monsoon season, it is both hot and humid. So the 110 degrees feels every bit of 110. We consider ourselves survivors to just “make it” in this kind of heat. This sort of environment can add frustration to an already tense marriage. So, that’s why we are talking with Jo Muirhead and John Drury. They are a married couple, whose work includes helping you achieve a balance in your marriage through work/life integration.

 

Both of my guests are well respected in their own niche, and they come together to share with us what it’s really like to have to live what they teach.  John is a mentor, author, speaker and he’s married to Jo. She’s a rehab counselor out of Sydney, Australia. She helps people return to work after an injury or other challenges that they’ve had. They now have a program for high achieving executives, to help them focus on the work/life balance that seems to be elusive.

 

Today Jo and John are here to put all the pieces together to help us achieve work/life balance!

 

Direct download: Jo_Muirhead_John_Drury_Edited.mp3
Category:Couples Relatiohships -- posted at: 3:00am PDT

Welcome to the 51st episode of The Couples Expert Podcast: Picking Up Love, Piece by Piece. In this episode, Stuart speaks to us about the incredible possibilities of healing and trust that can come from one true special relationship. And he provides us with some important insights into the power of Emotionally Focused Therapy and how the specific proven techniques of this method can actually help mend past traumas through connectedness, acceptance, trust and love. It only takes one.

Direct download: Picking_Up_Love_Piece_by_Piece.mp3
Category:Couples Relatiohships -- posted at: 7:11am PDT

Welcome to the 50th episode of The Couples Expert Podcast: Uncommon Relationships; Uncommon Love. Monogamy, non-monogamy, polyamory, polygamy, polyandry, sex-positive, swinging, open, LGBTQ... What does it all mean? And is it right for me and for my partner? As humans can be identified by their individual fingerprints, so can they identify themselves in absolutely unique and wonderful ways in the worlds of love, sex, and relationships.

Direct download: Uncommon_Relationships__Uncommon_Love.mp3
Category:Couples Relatiohships -- posted at: 1:46am PDT

Direct download: A_Therapy__Dog_Can_Be_Your_Relationships_Best_Friend.mp3
Category:Couples Relatiohships -- posted at: 4:37pm PDT

Rebecca Wong LCSW a Parent Couples specialized was interviewed on The Couples Expert Podcast learn how to stay close asnd connected as a parent couple  She stresses the importance of keeping love, intimacy, and play as essential incredients in any relationship but particularily important with parent couples. Listen to learn how to do this. 

Direct download: Parent_Couple_Relationships_Are_Reflections_Of_Ourselves.mp3
Category:Couples Relatiohships -- posted at: 7:14am PDT

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